I'm trying. Good grief, I really am trying.
I've been trying to be grateful, so I started writing in my journal every night things that I am grateful for that day. I have only been able to come up with three things a day, but at least that's a start. I was hoping that would change my negative/pessimistic outlook and help me focus on "what's right with this picture."
Then someone broke into my house last week.
Oh dear Jesus. That was a difficult night.
But God picked me back up and I did find things to be grateful for:
...I was grateful that the policeman said he would send out more patrol to my area.
...I was grateful to be learning that God is my Provider and Protector.
By God's grace, I was determined to get back up and keep fighting. I wasn't going to give up.
Then today happened.
And my car quit running...out of the blue...for no apparent reason...and the mechanic couldn't figure it out.
So I am grateful that my car didn't quit me on my long trip over weekend. I am grateful that it quit right outside an auto repair shop.
And I am praying that it is an easy fix. I'm kinda nervous that they didn't have an answer for me after having it all afternoon, so tomorrow I will call a tow truck and have it towed to a mechanic that I know and trust. Maybe it will be a simple fix, like a fuel filter. Maybe?
God, give me the grace to accept it if it is not and give me the strength to carry on.
2 comments:
:( so sorry, I can't imagin how hard that must all be. God sure has a funny way of givig us "only" what we can handle. That is what He promises, sometimes it seems like he forgot that promise. Then I think of Job... and I thank God that that's not me. I thank Him that Satan isn't just doing bad things to me to prove I'm not faithful, but rather He is walking with me through a fallen world and painting a beautiful picture in the process! By the way I have a shirt with the same saying on it, I sure don't have it down... but I try ;) Sending prayers your way today hopeing you get an extra measure of God's grace and find at least 4 blessings for your journal tonight!
Thanks, Amy! You are so sweet! This is just one of those times when His "blessings come through raindrops" and His "healing comes through tears." And I certainly hope it turns out to be a beautiful picture, because sometimes it feels so ugly! Thanks so much for the thoughts and prayers! I appreciate it very much.
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